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birthday again.

  I scrambled to write the excerpt I'm going to share down below one night in a fit of anxiety + general dread one night back in June. I get like this every June. I do this around New Year's, too.    I don't like the conception of time. I suppose it bothers me. It apparently worsens as I creep up the ladder of age. I do what I can to shift my thoughts onto anything lighter than the existential, but nonetheless: it remains.   I think I appreciate it about myself, if I'm honest. That is, if you take, "existential dread" + just shave off the "dread" portion. Annoyingly, being so chronically empirical about life can give one quite a bit of depth in perspective, I've found.   It makes moments more important. I document a lot of things because I have a fear of being forgotten, hence my love of photography & videography. I create so that I can try with everything in me to somehow let somebody know I was here on this planet, long after I'm gone. ...
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21 Years, 11 Months: A Check Point

  As my blog is dedicated to documenting my life, travels, thoughts, and trials in this decade of my life, I've decided on the idea of doing "check points". You know.. short and sweet bullet-pinned lists of where I'm at during various parts of my journey, with facts about how old I am, what sort of events are taking place in my life at the moment.. so, here goes:

  • i'm twenty one years old. i'll be twenty two in just a month and change.
  • i'm getting married in two months and change.
  • i still only have two dogs: woody, (joey's dog), a small, red dachshund, and popeye, my beagle/foxhound mix.
  • still only one tattoo.
  • favorite tv show.. meh, nothing really peaking my interest. patiently waiting for stranger things season three to come out on july 4th, (let's hope they don't screw it up).
  • three big moves in one year. 
  • same car since i was 17; my blue rav 4, 'bae blue'.
  • i'm starting a new job tomorrow that's only twenty minutes away from my house, after being forced to spend the last few months commuting and hour to-and-from my two jobs, since i had such a sudden move.
  • i'm still one big, fat procrastinator.
  • emptying the dishwasher really isn't as bad as it used to be when i was a kid.
  • favorite hobbies right now include paddle boarding on the river in front of the house.
  • currently reading "the silent sister" by diane chamberlain.
  • i literally hate cooking, but do it a lot more now than i ever have.
  • learning how to live in a house with joey all over again. rough.
  • no babies. no babies. no babies.
  • wedding planning has been going great. small amounts of stress. it feels like everything is going by so quickly; trying so hard to note, step back, and appreciate the special moments in this particular season of life.
  • even though he pushes my buttons, still very in-love with joey.
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